Stop Waiting On the World To Change!

AKA Rock the Vote!

In my last post, I mentioned that I would prefer Hillary Clinton over Barack Obama because I believe she would be more likely to get things done. Perhaps I was a bit hasty in that judgment, and I am always ready (though perhaps not immediately) to admit when I'm wrong. Two things have led me to change my opinion.

First, my husband pointed out that if Barack Obama were to be elected president, nobody would want to be seen as obstructionist in the era of new hope and idealism. I had to concede that I hadn't thought of that.

The second person to bring me fresh new insight was my husband's younger brother, who just today shared this commentary and rejuvenated my idealism and hope.

This renewed sense of caring about the world reminds me of the John Maher song, "Waiting On the World To Change." I see it as being the voice of those ten to twenty years younger than me, those Gen-X'ers (or is that me? Would the twenty-something people be Gen-Y?), not really cynical, but not feeling in control.

That song pisses me off. Actually, just one line in particular:
"We just feel like we don't have the means
To rise above and beat it"

This guy is 30 years old. Why do I mention this? Because he's old enough to vote. My brother-in-law (the one brother who hasn't piped in on the presidential issue) doesn't vote because statistically (he is an actuary) he knows that one vote does not make a difference. Fine, that may be true, but when voter turnout is an abysmal 64% in the presidential election, then perhaps if the other frickin' 36% of the people didn't all believe the same thing and would get off their tushies (my 3-year-old's favorite word these days since it hasn't officially been declared "inappropriate") and vote each of those one votes would make a difference.

So unless John Mayer and all his friends - and all those fans of his that shine their cellphone lights during that song during his concert, and all those who listen to the song the radio or on Sirius or on CD or their iPods (or tapes, why not?) and nod in agreement with his deep words - actually vote, then I don't want their generation complaining about the next administration - or about how horrible the last eight years have been.

Yes, this post is four years overdue, but seriously, VOTE!!!

Power To the People

First off, if you're a fan of George W. Bush, you may not want to read on. If, however, you would like to see the Democrats take office, read on. I haven't really weighed in on the whole political scene going on here in the good old US of A so far, but I thought maybe I should. Well, rather, I thought maybe I should let my friend Salil have his say.

I have included an email message that he sent to the campaigns of both Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama. I have modified it slightly to update the date reference, but otherwise have left the letter intact.

My own personal wish is to see Hillary Clinton take office. While I respect Barack Obama and his idealism, I don't think he is experienced enough to garner the cooperation of others in Washington. In the future, I would probably support him whole-heartedly. But for now, I support Hillary. Yes, in part, it is because she's a woman. But I also think she's a strong candidate. Part of me would like to be more involved and really help get her elected. And perhaps that is what this blog entry is about. But part of me is still too busy being a mom, wife, employee, dog-owner, and homeowner to even consider doing more.

So for now, 'nuff said. Here's what I'd like for you to do. If you agree with what this letter is saying, please feel free to copy the text of the message, paste it into Word, make whatever changes you need (I, for example, have not contributed financially to either campaign), sign it, and mail it to the campaigns. Also, copy it into an email message and send it to:

Terry McAuliffe
Hillary Clinton for President
4420 North Fairfax Drive
Arlington, VA 22203

tmcauliffe@hillaryclinton.com

Obama for America
P.O. Box 8102
Chicago, IL 60680


Subject: January 21st, 2008...the Night the Democrats Lost the Election?

Terry McAuliffe and David Plouffe,

I am a donor to both your candidates' campaigns, because I consider both Senator Clinton and Senator Obama viable and good candidates for the President of the United States.

I'm not sure what was going on on January 21st, but I think I'd echo the sentiments of many Democrats when I say I'm deeply dismayed by the obvious rancor between Senators Clinton and Obama during last night's debate.

This is not playing well in the national media, and it doesn't work to the benefit of either candidate. As tempting as it may have been for Senator Clinton to knock Obama off his high horse and pin him down, or for Senator Obama to attack President Clinton's (mis-?)characterizations of his voting record, this kind of mud-slinging is ugly and ultimately fruitless. It's one thing to attack your opponent's stances on the issues. It's another thing to make ad hominem attacks on the competition out of anger in front of television cameras in the middle of a purported debate.

I can't say it any more bluntly than this: both campaigns need to take the high road immediately. There are writeups in the Post, the NYT, and in every major media outlet. The underlying subtext is that HRC and Obama are like children who need to be disciplined. The good Senators might as well have pulled each other's hair and blown raspberries at each other, considering how this is playing out in the MSM.

Why give Edwards that kind of opening? Why give REPUBLICANS that kind of opening? Taking this campaign down into the mud is the wrong direction entirely. The target here is not Obama. It's not even the Republican nominee, whoever it may turn out to be. It's the Presidency, and it's not enough to just secure the nomination at any price. The goal is to keep the respective Senators electable, and that means maintaining support within the party, and even attempting to find common ground across party lines to generate a popular mandate, or at least an electoral edge.

Somehow, I don't see that happening the way things stand at the moment.

Is that too idealistic a viewpoint? Is there some deeper Rove-ian strategy at work for getting your candidates elected that I'm simply not privy to? If so, then I have to ask, even if somehow after all this America manages to elect either Clinton or Obama...what next?
How likely is it that Democrats suffer in the next election, and give up the Senate? Is anyone taking the long view at all? Are we banking collectively on the American electorate just somehow forgetting all this venom after the DNC in August? Believe me, the neocons will remember as soon as they have one real target to put in their crosshairs.

And even in the short-term tactical view, that both campaigns indulged in this sort of mud-wrestling just before the South Carolina primary is the sheerest sort of idiocy. South Carolina is Edward's home turf! South Carolina has a sizeable black population, and South Carolina is being covered by Bill, not Hillary, since she's moved on to the Super Tuesday states. What on earth is going on over there?

In an e-poll released Friday by the South Carolina New Democrats, Obama was favored by 30 percent of the respondents, while Clinton and Edwards were tied at 26 percent each. The unscientific poll of 1,000 computer users also showed that 63 percent of the respondents said change is most important while 37 percent said experience is paramount .

There's more at stake here than just securing the nomination of one candidate. I certainly understand the difficult job you both do, but at the same time, I think that the vast majority of Democrats would rather see a Democrat in the White House than allow the Democratic Party's internal bickering to reduce the popularity of the two front-runner candidates to the point that we wind up with a President Romney, McCain, or (god forbid!) Huckabee.

Sincerely,

Salil [last name omitted to secure his privacy]

Travel Bag Toy Review

So what are some games that we packed and how good were they? Thanks for asking. The numbers in parentheses at the end of each item is the age of the kid for whom this toy was intended/used)
1. Magna Doodle: Don’t leave home without it. Our home has been in possession of at least one of these portable versions – the Doodle Pro for the past six years. It’s great for any age (we start them at about age 1, when they first make the association between putting pen to pad and noticing it does something), and it really doesn’t take up too much space. (1,3,6)
2. Crayons and paper: I usually keep the crayons that the kids get at restaurants, and then pack a few of these mini boxes in the backpack, so I really don’t mind if they get lost or broken. And when they run out of paper, we hand them the Sky Mall catalog and in-flight magazine to have fun with – well, we always plan to, but somehow it hasn’t happened yet. (1,3,6)
3. A few toy cars: These honestly have yet to be played with, but I keep thinking that they’d be so entertaining rolling on the tray table during turbulence, and they take up so little room, that they’re staying. (1,3,6)
4. UNO: As it turns out, kids as young as three-and-a-half can understand the game. And the nice thing is, at that age, they don’t understand that it’s bad to lose, so you don’t have to worry about them crying, “He’s teasing me,” when his younger brother wins and cheers “I winned! I winned!” My kids learned this game in India, and proceeded to play with all their cousins. It was a great icebreaker. (3,6)
5. A deck of cards: While in India, my eldest also learned a few magic tricks, which he regaled at showing to everyone he met. The middle one tried some tricks too, though not as successfully as his brother. The youngest one, meanwhile, enjoyed picking up and dropping the cards over and over. So perhaps for older kids, cards are good on planes, while younger kids can enjoy them on land. (1,3,6)
6. Mandala Designer: I found this at PlayMatters in Shaker Square. It’s for older kids, though younger ones, again, can use it, though perhaps the end results are not as artistic as they could be. Basically, it’s a stencil in a box. Paper on the bottom, several circular stencils that you can rotate to repeat a particular design, a pen, and some colored pencils. All in a handy case. Draw the design using the stencil then pull the paper out and color it in. (3,6)
7. Mini tape measures: The plan was that when they got antsy from sitting in one place for too long, I would let my elder two boys walk around the aisles a little while “measuring things.” Well, somehow, they’re generally content to stay in their seats (apparently I’ve overstocked the toy bag) and they didn’t use them once on a plane, though they did use them later. Maybe next time. (3,6)
8. Wikki Stix: My boys got this as a gift years ago, and it is a great travel toy. Waxy, flexible, colorful sticks that you can shape into anything. Why my boys insist on building blobs with them, I don’t know. Downside, they collect dog hair easily, and rid of it hesitantly. (1,3,6)
9. Pipe Cleaners: I bought a pack of 100 multi-colored pipe cleaners from a local craft store, put it in a gallon-size Ziploc bag, and then play with my kids on the plane. We build glasses, flowers, the sun, people, etc. Still working on making them think in three dimensions, but it’s still fun. Caution: the ends are pointy, so be careful when playing with little ones. My youngest enjoys them as well, but I don’t let him use it unattended. (1,3,6)
10. Brain Quest Games: I only included a link to the 7-8 year old cards, though many others are available. I bought this one and the one for ages 3-4. I sat with the elder two boys and they took turns. One kid would answer one card of questions, and then the other would answer all the questions on one card. The nice thing is that the cards are all attached, so you don’t have to worry about dropping it on a plane and scrunching down to find them. This actually held the boys’ attention for quite a while, which always gets points in my book. (3,6)
11. Lauri Travel Activity Packs I got the Primer Pak for ages 3-6. Though my youngest was able to use some of it, perhaps I should have gotten the younger pack for him. (1,3)
12. Color Wonder Set: Markers that only work on specific paper? Sign me up! I don’t like it so much at home, because the artwork fades over time, which sucks for a homegrown masterpiece. But when traveling, giving them coloring books that you don’t care to hang onto forever… it works. (1,3,6)
13. Flash Cards: We have I Spy (so you can play Go Fish with a bizarre twist), alphabet, numbers, states and capitals, colors and shapes, and a couple more that currently elude me. We pack one set for each age. (1,3,6)
14. Klixx: I forgot all about this one. It occupied the kids - and the adults - plenty. It's cheap, small, and creative. I found it at PlayMatters, but I also saw it on Amazon.com. (1,3,6,35)

Next time, I think I’ll probably also (or instead) pack:

1. Rush Hour Jr.: My elder two boys love it, and it comes with a travel bag. (3,6)
2. Tangoes: Compact, puzzles that make the kids think, pieces that the kids can put in their own configurations, pieces too big to choke on. This isn’t on the other list only because I can’t find either one of our sets right now, and can’t bring myself to buy a third set. (1?,3,6)
3. Discovery Toys Green Gators: Discovery Toys is one of those Avon/Mary Kay/Pampered Chef/Creative Memories deals where you'd have to find an individual selling these products, which is why I didn't include a link. You can probably find this on eBay or Craig's List. The game is basically charades cards, with a picture of an item, then the name of the item in English & Spanish. It's for ages 6+, but I've been able to play it with my 3 year old by asking him guided questions and letting the other people playing guess. (otherwise, here's what ensues:
me: So, tell me about what's on the card.
3yo: it's a boat.
me: no, no. let's try again. [get out new card] You want to get the other person to guess what it is.
3yo (to other person): ok. What is it? What is it?
me: tell them something about it.
3yo: it's a banana.
finally... me: [with new card] Is it a type of food?
3yo: no.
me: What color is it?
3yo: green.
6yo: is it an animal?
3yo: yes.
me: Okay, so it's an animal that's green. Is it big or small?
3yo: small.
6yo: Is it a frog?
3yo: Yes! It's a frog!

Well, that’s all I can remember right now. One other thing we do is keep the bag packed at all times. This isn’t to say we’re ready to travel on a moment’s notice, but rather it keeps most of the toys out of the kids’ hands at non-traveling times, so they actually only play with these toys on trips, and their novelty hasn’t completely worn off by the time the plane is in the air. And never discount the appeal that a toy intended for one boy has for his brother. If you can assuage the jealousy and settle the fight, it could extend the usefulness of any game.

Flying with Kids

I’ve recently accrued some serious frequent flier miles, as have my 3 kids. And in the process, I’ve put forth considerable thought into how to make the experience a positive one. I read numerous articles, online and in the newspaper, and talked to countless people who offered all sorts of advice on what to do, and what to take, on a cross-country – or overseas – flight with young children. And so, with this knowledge, I thought I’d compile it all into a handy place so 1) I don’t go crazy trying to reinvent the wheel next time I travel, and 2) other people can benefit from my experience (or laugh at my folly, whatever).

First a little background. I traveled with 3 boys, ages six-and-a-half, three-and-a-half, and almost one-and-a-half. First we flew from Cleveland to San Francisco, then drove down to Los Angeles, drove around LA a lot, and then flew back to Cleveland. Our second trip was from Cleveland to Mumbai, with a layover in Newark, lots of travel within Mumbai (taxis, cars, and even auto-rickshaws – oh what fun!), and then, of course, flying back Mumbai-Newark-Cleveland. I will henceforth refer to these as the California trip and the India trip. We don’t like to carry a lot of items onto the plane, but typically, we have a diaper bag, a small bag with some snacks, and a rolling backpack for the kids. For the India trip, we took along one of those carry-on suitcases with a change of clothes for everyone, extra toys, extra snacks, and a toiletry bag (although we stupidly kept full-size tubes of toothpaste – both ours and the kids’ – in there and had to get rid of them after the security screening. Oops).

Packing snacks is always a debacle for us, because the kids are so picky that they never want what I pack. Or maybe I just suck at picking snacks. But as long as I don’t think of the food as being just for the plane ride, but rather for the trip, it evens out – generally. Before we went to California, we stopped by at our favorite local bakery and picked up some goodies – sticky buns, chocolate croissants, almond croissants, scones, giant chocolate chip cookies – which everyone in the family loves. This collection, the assortment of flavored snack crackers (peanut butter and honey, grilled cheese, etc.), and the snacks in the basket that my brother’s wife’s family left for us when we checked into the hotel for my brother’s wedding, gave the kids their pre-breakfast that tided them over until we could all wake up and get presentable enough to make it down to breakfast. Granola bars never got eaten. The mini packs of ring pasta (Spaghettios) was tossed by security (oops). But the kids love buying things, so get them a yogurt at the coffee shop at the airport and they'll be happy.

Jumping back a bit chronologically, I want to mention that we bought three identical t-shirts from On The Rise (our favorite local bakery), and dressed the boys in them – with long sleeved shirts underneath – for traveling. They wore them on both legs, and as we arrived in Cleveland, a flight attendant waiting at the gate actually recognized them, mentioning that she remembered their shirts. The benefits, as I see it, are two-fold. 1) By dressing the kids in identical shirts, if by chance one would accidentally be misplaced (for lack of better word), we could grab the closest brother and ask passersby, “Have you seen someone that looks like this only smaller/bigger?” and 2) We’re helping support local business.

We try to stick to our regular routine as much as possible when we travel, so the kids feel somewhat comfortable in every new place (and in India, there were quite a few new places). So we packed a couple of their favorite books to read (when they didn’t fall asleep in the car), and we had to pack at least one “animal friend” for each of them, in case they needed one. While for the most part, they did fine without, we didn’t want to risk a meltdown. They understood ahead of time that we wouldn’t pack a) anything too bulky (takes up too much luggage space) and b) any of their absolute favorites (cannot risk losing it) – so Cheetah, Doggy, Kitty Cat, and the little bear that the middle one got when he was in the hospital – were off limits. However, they had to be important enough that they would serve the comforting needs as required (a.k.a. second-tier animal friends, or animal close-acquaintances?). So Baby Simba and the two grownup Simbas came with us – and they did come out to play.

To be totally honest, the flight to California sucked. The little one was totally exhausted and couldn’t fall asleep and spent way too much time crying to let any subsequent sleep make up for the beginning of the flight. And frankly, had we not already purchased our India tickets before that trip, we very likely would not have gone. But that would have been unfortunate, because there was something that we had not taken into account.

We took direct flights for our California trip. This is very important to do, as it makes no sense to subject young children (and their parents) to a seven-hour journey when a four-hour option is available. But our second criterion was cost, not schedule. So the times when we were on the plane were not optimal. Our return flight left LA at 7am, so we got the kids up early, let them sleep in the car, and roused them for the day just as they were confined to sit in one place for the next four hours. And having them do silly obstacle course exercises – twenty jumping jacks, hop from here to there, do a silly dance – at the gate to get rid of their energy only helps so much; they recover from their physical exhaustion well before the flight is over.

In contrast, our flight to India left at 8:40pm – after their normal bedtime – and the return flight departed at 11:40pm. That meant that the boys stayed awake late, and then got onto the plane ready for a good night’s sleep. And since they sleep about 12 hours normally, we could count on at least 8 to 10, which effectively cut the flight time in half. After that much of the flight has passed, you’re mentally more capable of handling the challenge of managing three young, energetic boys on the plane. And that is where the supplies come into play.

First, fly on a Boeing 777-200e (note the e). It’s a nice plane. Each seat has its own video screen that has movies, shows, and games on demand. The 777-200 is nice too, with the individual screen, but it’s not on-demand and the games are less plentiful and the controller harder to use. This may not be something you can control, but if you can, do so. The upgrade is worth it. So that said, you can eliminate portable DVD player and video game console of the list, right? Well, our six-year-old got a Nintendo DS for Christmas, and that did come in handy as well.

I’ll do a separate post reviewing different toys that we packed for the kids. But we did pack a lot of toys, and on the trip to India, kept about a third of it in our other travel bag, so we could offer a fresh selection once they went through all the original items.

They have yet to use all their toys on a trip. I packed a moleskin journal for my six-year-old to chronicle his experiences in India. Perhaps one day I'll post the one entry he did make. But to end on a nice, cheesy note, one great way to pass a lot of time on a plane is to sit and talk to - and listen to - your kid. Finally, with nothing else to do, with no other distractions and no multi-tasking possible (leave those computers at home!!!) I could finally sit and listen to those endless stories that they're just so eager to tell.

Wait, this was supposed to be about how to make the flight seem shorter, right?

Things that make you go “What The?”

For starters, I think that I’m a pretty conscientious parent. I try to set a good example, and when I catch my kids repeating some bad action of my own, I work hard to eliminate said behavior. For example, a three-year-old is quite apt to repeat words that you say, especially, it seems, ones that you don’t even realize you’re saying. That said, I have curbed my tendency toward profanity considerably, and when I feel inclined to swear, I catch myself and turn the potential cuss word into nonsensical syllables – Shhhhhiakamatafam. Fffffooooooeeeeee. You get the point. But the one that I didn’t realize I used most of all was one that my eldest son uses quite often, and completely accurately, is “What the?” That’s it. Nothing after it. Just “What the?” The funny thing for me is realizing that as far as he is concerned, that’s the whole phrase. So I don’t feel compelled to stop him from “swearing” and I get to chuckle inside whenever I hear him.

Anyhow, I’ve been trying to think about my next blog topic (actually I’m also trying to come up with a good Sharepoint application, but that's beside the point), and the best I could come up with was mentioning a couple things that just don’t make sense to me. My husband thought I should title this article “It’s my job to write about the mundane,” which is how I responded to his look when I told him about what I was planning to write about. But this is actually kind of reminding me of a story I had written back in college titled “Grasshoppers, Laughs, and the Letter Q” that I should probably post some time. It was really about the mundane (like, why are grasshoppers called grasshoppers? Do they appreciate being known only by one thing that they do - their tendency to hop grass?) The story was actually chosen to be published in 3 consecutive issues of a free publication in Columbus called “The Green Bean” (back in 1995), but after the first issue, they went out of business and the last two-thirds of the story never got published. And then Seinfeld became famous, and if I try to sell it now, it’s like I’m just a Seinfeld-wannabe. Oh well.

Anyhow, here are a couple of things that make me go “What the?” First of all, just because Immodium can be chewed, that doesn’t mean it should be chewed. For our recent trip to India, I bought some chewable Immodium, figuring that if we’re somewhere where the water is of questionable quality, and we needed the medicine, we should be able to take it despite the water restriction. Well, regular Immodium tablets are so tiny that – I discovered later – I can swallow one just with saliva. But by making giant, chewable tablets, the makers of Immodium couldn’t completely hide the bitter taste of the pill.

The other thing I wonder about these days is why lotion soaps are so popular. The soap in my bathroom boasts about being one-fourth moisturizing cream. Doesn’t lotion work best by being applied to and then left on your hands? Aren’t you just paying more money to have less soap to clean with? If lotion is so important and necessary, is it really so difficult wash and dry your hands and THEN apply lotion? And to be clear, I picked up the soap at the grocery store, where all three of my options contained lotion.

This makes me realize and appreciate, however, the beauty of marketing. My three-year-old, who cannot read, knows Kix from Cookie Crisp from Cocoa Pebbles (yes, we stock all three at our house, though more of the latter two – no high fructose corn syrup in my cereal!). He can differentiate between McDonald’s, Wendy’s, Taco Bell, and Burger King.

That said, realizing the power of marketing, I have used my own brand of brainwashing, for good, not evil. Now when we drive past a fast food restaurant, he tells me that we shouldn’t eat there because they have chemicals.